Two posts in the same month. Watch out now.
Had a pretty rough time this past weekend… mentally. I not only hit the vaunted “Iqaluit Wall” but I was also contending with some issues on a social level with some people I had considered good friends at one point in time. Bad combination to deal with let me tell you. In the midst of my loathing and frustration I realized that I had forsaken a philosophy I developed a long time ago.
It’s high time I dropped the knowledge about WFI. I’ve spread the word to a select few already (with resounding success) but have never really revealed it to the general public. It’s a radical self-help treatment that is geared towards preservation of one’s own sanity. Whatever, Fuck it. That’s what it stands for. WFI isn’t just a philosophy; it’s a way of life. It turns everything you’ve been taught for years on its head.
I’m the kind of person that enjoys making other people happy. That’s why I’m the consummate jokester. Making people laugh, breaking tension, bringing someone’s mood up makes me feel good inside. No matter how awesome I happen to be, I am still human (supposedly) and prone to those crippling emotions such as doubt, regret, anger or frustration. What happens when the clown is sad? I’ve referred to it being the Pagliacci Syndrome on more than one occasion. It’s hard to be “on” all the time when you’re surrounded by the same challenges everyone else is. You’re given crooked looks when you happen to be in a bad mood. You’re criticized about your attitude when you’re not trying to make someone else’s day better. It’s almost expected that you worry more about someone else than you do yourself.
That’s where WFI comes into play.
WFI is all about being selfish. Yes. I said it. I promote selfishness. I’m not talking about absolute selfishness to the point of being a raging asshole. No, but every person needs a certain semblance of selfishness in their lives otherwise how can you stay happy and make others happy which in turns makes you happier?
Get what I’m saying?
You have to pick and choose your battles with WFI. You can’t just WFI everything because like I said earlier, you’ll be exhibiting high levels of douchiness. WFI does two primary things. Firstly it defines what you consider important and secondly establishes clear boundaries with people with regards to being taken advantage of. Yes. Many people don’t even realize when they’re being taken advantage of. The line between kindness and exploitation is often blurred when dealing with friends and loved ones. Ever notice how sometimes when you do something you feel is out of the “kindness of your heart” later makes you feel agitated? That’s because you just got exploited. It’s a natural response to doing something you really didn’t want to do. Everyone believes in fair shakes, give & take, equality, compromise and all that jazz but how often does it truly happen? It’s not the other person’s fault. In fact it’s rarely an intentional act by them. If you’ve set up a systematic pattern of concessions it’s easy to confuse what is being kind and what is a concession because of your intent to please.
How many times have you been frustrated about something and harped on it in the back of your mind to the point of madness? Take control of what you can and WFI. If it’s an issue beyond your control save your brain and dictate what affects it. It’s really that simple. You owe it to yourself to at least maintain your own sanity.
Whatever, Fuck it.
You can’t just say WFI; you have to believe in it. You have to truly cast whatever is bugging the hell out of you out of your mind. Don’t let it slither its way back in either. If it doesn’t affect your health, mental or physical, then decide whether it’s really worth racking your brains over and WFI. You’ll be amazed at how insignificant many perceived problems are when you just simplify matters. You can’t be there for your loved ones if you’re damaged goods. Help yourself help others by helping yourself.
Got something irking you?
Whatever, Fuck it… and move on to more important business.
Firstly, let me apologize.
I want to apologize for rattling off yet another rant. I know I’ve only been doing this for blogging thing for only about 2 weeks but I just don’t want it misconstrued that I’m a consummate complainer. The way I see it the sooner I can get the bothersome topics off my chest the sooner I can speak more lucidly.
With that said, let the party begin…
When exactly did parenting become optional? Why do more and more parents feel the need to get their child’s approval rather than their respect? Most of all, what the heck happened to disciplining children? I’ve had these questions juggling around in my head for years now and haven’t really come to any conclusion other than the usual laziness and idiocy excuses. I mean seriously… what caused such a drastic shift in ethics? I’m not an old dude. I’m only in my mid-30’s yet it seems like the values between my generation and the current ones are damn near polar opposites.
You have every right to choose to become a parent but once you’re a parent that’s your job 27/7 till the kiddies are all grown up. When referring to optional parenting I’m talking about this all too common methodology of parents pawning off their kids to their parents whenever they get tired of parenting – forcing the grandparents to play a much larger role in the child’s upbringing. Don’t get me wrong, they should be involved their lives but not to the point where they are essentially raising the children. The excuse for needing time away from them range from wanting to party to just needing a break. Everyone needs a break but when one starts abusing a parent’s good will that’s just wrong on so many levels. They did their job. They served their time. They shouldn’t have to be saddled with doing double duty on parenting and yet more and more young couples continue to take advantage of their parents.
If having a child is so much of a burden or you’re missing out on sooo much because of them, then maybe you should have thought about that before hopping in the sack.
Seeking a child’s approval is about the most reprehensible pattern I’ve seen as of late. So many parents are looking to please their children and be their friends rather than earn their respect. There’s a very thin line between making your child happy and pleasing your child and unfortunately many can’t tell the difference. I had a very happy childhood. I am an only child so one would assume I had everything handed to me on a silver platter. Quite the contrary. My parents were strict but very fair. Nothing was purely given to me. Everything had to be earned and the way you earned anything was by working for it and respecting that their word was the law. I never cursed in front of my parents (or any member of my family for that matter). Heck, I still hold true to that to this day (and I have a mouth like a drunken sailor outside the family setting). I respected my elders, performed my chores and stayed out of trouble. Embarrassing my parents or myself was a no no in their book and I thank them for teaching me that early. I believe that was the basis for self-respect that helped turn me into the person I am today. It’s just sad that parents nowadays don’t have the time or patience to follow through on anything they say. They seek the quick fix solution of buying them whatever whenever and all that teaches them is that with enough whining and bitching, they can get what they want.
A parent is an authority figure, whether you want to believe that or not. It’s a parent’s duty to craft a child’s values and instill a certain semblance of fear and respect for authority. I understand that a lot of parents don’t and won’t raise a hand to their child and that’s their prerogative. An authority figure doesn’t have to be tyrannical and you don’t need to be physical in order to enforce discipline. My parents rarely gave me a whoopin’. If I recall correctly I got an ass tanning maybe 3 times throughout my entire career as a child. My father was a big man – a former football player. That alone put a bit of apprehension in my soul. I figured it would be best not to do anything to piss that large man off too much, but like most children often do I tested the boundaries just to see how far I could go. Let me tell you, I didn’t go back to that edge too often.The first spanking was all I needed to know what was too far. He’d never have to raise a hand to me whenever I was on the verge of doing something stupid.
I’d just get the look.
My mother never ever laid a hand on me but she too possessed the power of the look. Between the two of them casting death gazes at me I rarely had any time to really do anything outlandishly dumb and when I did, I got a repeat performance of the first spanking. As you can see I wasn’t a hard learner. I ended up respecting my parents as the authority figures they were. They’re my best friends ever, but they have always been parents first and friends second not vice versa like you see in today’s families. Giving your child a spanking isn’t child abuse. Repeatedly hitting your child for every little infraction is. As is always the case, people just can’t do anything in moderation. CPS isn’t going to come and kick down your door for spanking your child once in a blue moon for some dumb shit they’ve done. It’s just naive parents who fall for that threat.
Parenting isn’t easy. I know that. It’s a thankless, no-pay, job that very few are qualified for. You need a license to own a dog or a gun. You need a license to drive a car or operate heavy machinery. You even need a license to catch a fish. Unfortunately they’ll let anyone be a parent. I want to apologize to the good parents of the world. I recognize and commend you for bringing love, values, respect and responsibility into their lives. If anything I say offended you just remember this – if it doesn’t apply to you then there’s nothing to get mad about. If you’re doing your thing and getting the job done then I’m obviously not referring to you so there’s no reason to be offended.
Sure it can be construed as hypocritical of me lamenting on parenthood having no children of my own, but then again I don’t make the idiots. I just observe them.
I love it when I’m able to get away from the city… even if for just a couple of days. I spent the past couple of days in the quaint little tourist town of Tobermory. It’s located in cottage country at the tip of the Bruce Peninsula in Ontario, CA right on Lake Huron. There’s nothing much to Tobermory in regards to being a bustling metropolis. The tourists outnumber the residents at least 3 – 1, there’s no such thing as street lamps for as far as the eye can see, and the term “walking distance” can’t be applied to anything convenient as far as goods are concerned. There are no Tim Horton’s. No Blockbusters. Heck there’s not even a movie theater within 100km. No dance clubs, supermarkets, malls, or internet cafes.
So why the hell would anyone go there?
For those exactly those reasons. Fresh air, mom & pop shops, an abundance of untouched nature and relaxing beaches are the selling points to this Canadian oasis. It’s kind of a throwback to a time when you could pass a stranger on the road and welcome them with a wave and a warm smile as opposed to locking your door and turning a blind eye. All too often we get so wrapped up in the day-to-day of everyday city life that we can’t even appreciate the little things like a cloudless sunny day or having the feeling of cool wet sand between your toes. As I drove back home reminiscing about sitting on the beach in the dead of night with family and friends, listening to the gentle crashing of waves against the rocky shore and staring up at the crystal clear star mapped sky above it made me think about how excessive are.
Everywhere you look there’s someone expressing their opinion about technology. Some feel we are becoming too dependent on it while others feel our future lies with the expansion of our scientific boundaries. Sadly both sides are about as fanatical as South American football fans when it comes to getting their point across. I love to play Devil’s Advocate whenever possible because people need to have things put back into perspective. It pains me to see and hear technophobes blabber on and on about how much we need to sever our ties and get back to basics. Let’s have a look at the word technology. There are several definitions:
- the branch of knowledge that deals with the creation and use of technical means and their interrelation with life, society, and the environment, drawing upon such subjects as industrial arts, engineering, applied science, and pure science.
- the terminology of an art, science, etc.; technical nomenclature.
- a technological process, invention, method, or the like.
- the sum of the ways in which social groups provide themselves with the material objects of their civilization.
Living off the grid does not make one exempt from the trappings of technology. Everything revolves around technology. Get used to it. Technology isn’t just wires, electricity, metal, plastic and gadgetry. Technology refers to the practical application of any process to enhance the way of life. Even a simple wooden outhouse with a shit bucket for a toilet is considered product of technology. There is absolutely no way we can abandon technology all together even if we wanted to… which none of us would want to do no matter how adamantly protested. Unless you plan to roam the wilderness butt naked and hunt with your bare hands (because any kind of weapon would be considered using technological means) there’s not much to argue about.
I honestly don’t think we’ve become super dependent on technology like some would suggest. Yes we’ve come leaps and bounds in the past century and we have access to far more innovations than we have ever had in history but the problem isn’t with our advancement but our own over-indulgence. As a species we are glutenous, excessive, and materialistic in whatever we do. Be it land, money, political power, religious influence or whatever there’s no end to our insatiable hunger for more. Advances in technology aren’t to blame for our decline in social graces or detrimental effects on the world around us. It’s our own human nature that’s the problem. There is no moderation in anything we do. Everything has to be now. Everything has to be in abundance. Sharing is a deprecated term and “living within your means” is an unattainable goal for most. I can sit here till the cows come home and balk about how selfish humans are but at this point in time it’s pointless. People are going to do what they’re going to do. To spend time trying to coerce them into a more logical and frugal way of thinking is just an incredible waste of time. Instead of damning those who can’t live without excess, let me commend those that can.
Balance between necessity and excess is the only way to progress effectively as a race. No one is saying that you shouldn’t or can’t have nice things but c’mon… does one person really need a half dozen cars, several cellphones, multiple houses, etc.
Excess incites jealousy.
Jealousy breeds animosity.
Animosity leads to violence and self-destruction.