Posts tagged “wasting time

How long does it take you to make a simple post?


So it’s June 6th and no new posts until now. Way to stay on the ball there, Ian.  I’m a victim though. An unfortunate casualty of being a multi-tasker with a short attention span. I rarely post anything on weekends because blogging  (for me) is a time-consuming task for me. I daresay it comes eerily close to being work sometimes. I spend more time editing, tweaking and dolling up a post than I do actually writing it. But then again getting the many bits and chunks of my thought chowder into the bowl can be an effort in itself.

So what better way to post than to post about how long it takes me to make a post…

  • 9:15am – My task starts today with my Monday visits to my blogroll. I need to read so that I can get my brain jump-started to do my coding. I’m starting to feel the oppressive thumb of the blank calendar pressing down on my forehead so I’m going to make a post today… but what about? I’ve had tons of though vomit over the past couple of weeks but would any of it be worthy of a post? Why not write about how long it takes to make a post? I started the post a couple of weeks back but it only got as far as a title. Takes too long to write a post so I had left it. I figured I’d come back to it eventually…
  • 9:43am – Read more blogs than I originally set out to and noticed that I was missing a couple of key elements on my own. I usually make my Facebook rounds while I’m catching up on WordPress and realized I never put up a badge for my work page. Being the true slacker I am I haven’t checked the status of that page in a couple of months. To my surprise I have enough fans to actually get a legit Facebook page name. I can’t very well go and post without updating that first…
  • 9:56am – With the page badge added and other nick knacks tweaked it’s time to image hunt. Can’t very well have a post without at least one picture. Shouldn’t be too hard to track one down related to the subject matter….
  • 10:27am – That took far longer than I wanted but I found something worthwhile. Now I can upload it to the bucket and get to writing. Damn. Morning business emails are starting to trickle in. Have to tend to those first. Plus Suzanne and I are currently trying to hash out some personal business via email. I wonder if this post will get out before noon…
  • 10:59am – Just sent out a flurry of replies to business associates, still conversing with Suzanne while trying to write this post and get work done at the same time. I’m getting the uneasy suspicion that I’ve done a post exactly like this before. I have to check. My memory is for shit…
  • 11:07am – Okay. It wasn’t exactly the same but pretty close. That one talked more about how easily distracted I get during the course of a work day. Course that’s kinda what’s happening here too. Sheesh. Tracking that down was hard. For a person that balks about not writing enough I’ve written a lot. I really need to go back to my older posts and reformat them slighty. Not right now of course. I have to finish this bloody post off. Damn the perfectionist in me. Uh oh… another reply from Suzanne. Gotta read and respond….
  • 11:20am – Had to break out the calculator for that email. I hate math. Oh well there seems to be substantial enough content to justify a post. Time to spell check. Lord knows I’ve been a typo tornado in comments as of late. Don’t want to muck it up here as well….
  • 11:23am – 12 errors? Really? Trust me people, I’m not a complete idiot. I just can’t type. Seriously. 12+ years in front of a computer and I still rock the 6 fingers typing style. It’s getting close to lunch. I have to do my last minute formatting and preview it…
  • 11:28am – Damn. Lots of caveman speak and Twitter grammar. Need to clean that up and make it somewhat coherent…
  • 11:36am – Okay. That makes a bit more sense now. You suck balls spellcheck. I found a couple of errors you missed. You were going to just go and let me post that and look like a total fool. I’m onto you. Dammit! I forgot tags. I suppose I should add them now…
  • 11:43am – Tags entered. One more check before I publish… and I still don’t know what the HELL is a Wang Chung and why I would want to do it tonight?? Damn you iTunes…
  • 11:48am – Looks solid but chances are I’ll find something after publishing. Oh well. Total time consumed making this post:  2 hours 33 minutes. Awesome.

How long does it take any of you to make a simple post? 😉

Advertisements

Overinformation: The Secret to Unproductivity


Overinformation. That’s right.

You won’t find that in Webster’s. It’s yet another word I’ve made up. I’m not only a Professional Dumbass but I’m also on the Board of Directors for Procrastination Incorporated. I’m quite certain my severe lack of book smarts leads me to get easily distracted by the shininess of the Internet. I’ve found that a good chunk of my time “working” is spent being sidetracked by a mind that thinks like a 10 year old and having access to any information you want instantly.

Good thing I’m my own boss. I’d fire my ass if I were employed by me.

In an attempt to display some faux intelligence I’ve developed a formula for my procrastination. Do I care if it makes mathematical sense or not? Of course not. If someone tries to explain the nuances of Algebra and Calculus I’ll just nod in agreement and put on my interested face as I start playing “Deep Cover” in my brainPod. Anyway here’s what it looks like:

(My Childlike Brain / My Music Taste) x ((Wikipedia + Google + IMDB) x ( YouTube + WordPress)) =  (Un)Productivity

So once again I’ve decided to take you all on a strange and beautiful ride on my Train of Thought as I cruise through a typical work morning. Mind you everyday isn’t like this. Sometimes I’m actually so hard core into the work sitting in front of me that I’ll start seeing the real world in pixels, but every so often I have an experience like this:

  • Throw on headset and start working…
  • 2 hours  into coding “Push it” by Garbage comes on. Halfway through the song I wonder if I just heard Shirley Manson say Push it. Make the penis go harder. That’s perverted kinda. Did she actually say that? I’ve never really paid attention to the lyrics. I’m quite certain she said that. I have to check the lyrics on that…
  • Open up Google in another browser tab and type in “push it garbage lyrics”. Dang. It says Push it. Makes the beats go harder. My lyrics make more sense. I wonder what Shirley is up to lately? Last I saw she was on The Sarah Connor Chronicles. I wonder if she ditched music all together and is acting now…
  • Google “shirley manson”. Hmm… lots of rocker pictures of the demented red head. She’s hot in a weird sorta way. Ah. The Internet Movie Database. Always one of my favorite sites. That should be able to tell me if she’s full time acting now…
  • Nope. She was just in the The Sarah Connor Chronicles. I liked that show. A lot of people bashed it but it was fun watching. Lena Headey was hot. Oh man. It must be the accent and the look. Not so much of  a fan of the tats but she has that “I’ll break you” look in her eyes. That’s provocative. Boy if I was rich and famous… and single… and in Hollywood… let me click through see if she’s up to anything…
  • Right on! She’s in that series coming on HBO soon – Game on Thrones. That looks like something up my alley. Reminds me of the good ole days of gaming. I should really try to rally some forces and bring the art of gaming up here to the north. There are tons of nerds up here. I just got to crack their tough business exteriors…
  • Just Can’t Get Enough” by Depeche Mode comes on. It immediately makes me think of Karl Pilkington. I remember him rocking out to that while in Mexico on that show An Idiot Abroad. That dude is trip. How can anyone be that clueless yet utterly brilliant? I heard he didn’t want to do a continuation to that series. I wonder if there’s any info on that…
  • Google “karl pilkington”. Ahh.. Wikipedia. They always keep up to date with stuff. 10 minutes into reading through his Wikipedia page “Putting Out the Fire” by David Bowie chimes in…
  • Hmm. That was such a perfect song in Inglourious Basterds. I’d like to put fire out with gasoline. That’d be like a huge fire…hehe. I wonder if Quentin is putting out another movie sometime soon. I rarely don’t not like his flicks…
  • Jump back to imdb.com. One of the headlines reads “Oh No! Jackass Star Steve-O Busted in Canada“. Oh lord. What has he done now? That nut. Busted in Canada, eh? I’m in Canada. I have to read this…
  • Outstanding warrant? Figures. That wasn’t all that interesting. Hey what’s this (as my eye glances to the Top News”)… “Could Will Ferrell join ‘The Office’ full time?“. Ha! That’d be hilarious. I have to read this…
  • After clicking through and reading the full article on E! Online I look down at my system tray and notice the time – 11:41 am. Dang! I just wasted about an hour browsing around and writing this post. Dammit! And I have to find a picture for the post too. Can’t very well post without at least one picture…
  • Google “procrastibnation” . Screw you Google. I know I misspelled it. I don’t need you to tell me that.  Stop trying to prove your intelligence to me. I’m not impressed. My finger slipped. You know what I was meaning. Just show me the bloody images…
  • 5 minutes into sifting through images I realize none of them suit me. I should just make my own. I am a designer after all, right?
  • Google “computer mouse”. “Rock Lobster” by the B-52’s comes on. Ha ha. This song is the worst most awesome song ever. Why am I listening to this? I heard they put out another album not too long ago. They’re old… but I like Kate Pierson. She’s a gilf for sure. Am I weird for saying that? I should find some pictures of her. NO. Stop it and finish your post!
  • 10 minutes later with “One” by Metallica shredding through my earphones I manage to finish off my crappy graphic and get it uploaded to photobucket. OMG! This is without a doubt one of the best metal songs ever. Old Metallica rocks! What the hell happened to them? They went to hell when Jason Newsted left. They used to epitomize cool but now suck so much ass. How can Metal Gods turn into mortal douches? Dammit. I hate the net up here. Why does everyone have to come online at the same time? Oh wait. It’s lunch time. Time for a break…

You see ladies and gentlemen, that’s how a typical morning can just get away from me. I’ve purposefully laced this post with more links than usual just to prove a point. If you’ve been here reading this and clicking through links I’ve posted and doing everything but what you’re supposed to be doing then you too are a valued member of the Corporation.

Remember. The only real recyclable waste is wasted time. Cheers!